Save a Victim
Drunk-driving tragedy spurs Sarah Alasya to help others avoid making a fatal mistake
Don’t drink and drive. It’s life-saving advice, which Sarah Alasya takes seriously. In fact, over the past four years, she has helped around 500 people avoid making that mistake. Alasya is Midwest division manager, physician office division, for Medline.
For Alasya, it’s personal. Her younger brother, Matthew, is serving a 6 1/2-year prison term for drinking while driving, and killing another driver.
It happened in June 2013, when Matthew was 22. “He was just out partying with friends at local bars and chose to drive home,” she says. “He blacked out and ended up getting on the freeway going the wrong way. He hit Vincent Canzani head-on less than a mile onto the freeway. Vincent died at the scene.”
Matthew was in the hospital for several days after the crash, she explains. “Our family didn’t leave his side. We were sure, though, he would be arrested after leaving the hospital. He came to my house to recover, and every day we waited for police to show up.”
But they didn’t. For three months, Matthew’s life was at a standstill. “He didn’t know what to do,” says Alasya. “The guilt ate him up.”
Sarah Alasya
During those three months, Matthew found via social media an organization called “Because I said I would,” a nonprofit dedicated to the betterment of humanity through promises made and kept. The group does so through “Promise cards,” chapters of volunteers, character education in schools, and awareness campaigns.
“I believe it was over a few weeks that he spoke with the founder, Alex Sheen, and together they decided to do a PSA,” says Alasya. “Matthew wanted to prevent others from making the same decisions. He felt that it was his duty to do so, but didn’t know the best way to get that message out. He wanted the help of someone who just wanted to make a difference.
“‘Because I said I would’ has unique social media strategies for getting messages out to followers, and the organization helped Matthew create a message and spread it.”
That message came in the form of a 3 1/2-minute video titled “I Killed a Man,” in which Matthew tells his story. It went live on YouTube Sept. 3, 2013.
“My family wasn’t aware he was doing this,” says Alasya. “We found out right before ‘Because I said I would’ posted the video on YouTube. We begged him not to release it, because we just wanted to protect him. The video put it all out there and took away some options as far as the court system goes, but he had never been so sure of anything.
Grace Etter, Yellow cab employee Creighton, Ilker Alasya and Sarah Alasya (kneeling)
“He said it was like a weight had been lifted. I had mixed feelings when I first saw it. It was powerful, but it was also my little brother. Today I am beyond proud of him, and share the video as often as I can. For him, and later what I realized for many others, it was the right thing to do.”
Shortly after the video went viral – receiving a million hits in just a couple of days – a warrant was issued for Matthew’s arrest. He turned himself in on Sept. 10, 2013. On Oct. 23, he was sentenced to 6 1/2 years mandatory in prison. He will be released on March 7, 2020.
Response
“I remember being worried to tell my manager and coworkers at the time,” says Alasya. “I was afraid that because the story had so much attention, it could create backlash for me personally and professionally. But they were extremely supportive.”
Most of the online responses were positive as well, she says.
“Many that reached out didn’t know us personally, but I think they could feel that Matt was genuine, and most could relate in some way. Many people wanted to tell us their own stories. Some were offenders and some had been victims. A lot of people wanted to know more about Matt in general. They were supportive of him and our family.
“Social media connected us to all kinds of people. Harold Dennis, a survivor of the nation’s deadliest drunk driving crash – 27 people were killed when a drunk driver hit a school bus in Carrollton, Kentucky, in 1988 – reached out to our family. Many people had sent him the video, and I think he just wanted to know more. He had wanted the offender in his story to do exactly what Matthew was doing – take responsibility.
“Ultimately, he ended up meeting Matthew in jail, and today he and I still talk regularly. He has become someone I admire, and I am thankful to have him in my life. There were some negative comments too, of course. They were hard to read, and I had to stop myself from commenting back.”
Save Your Victim
“It was hard not to be totally wrapped up in it all since the story had gone worldwide,” she recalls. “I didn’t sleep much, and my mind raced. With people reaching out, telling us stories, sharing pictures of those they had lost to drunk drivers, it felt overwhelming.”
She threw herself into her work to keep busy, but she knew she needed something else to channel all that energy.
“It started with the idea of a website, where all those stories could be shared publicly, in hopes of helping others and bringing light to the issue,” she says. “From there we started having local groups contact us, and I had the opportunity to join a local DUI taskforce. A local cab company, Yellow Cab, also sat on the taskforce, and they have been an amazing resource for us.
“My brother had all these ideas in prison to help people, but of course implementing them is the tough part, so we created the nonprofit – Save Your Victim – in hopes of making those things happen. Today, together with Yellow Cab, we host safe ride events, typically around busy weekends or big social events. These events are run solely by volunteers and nonprofit dollars.
“We will give anyone – no questions asked – a ride home with Yellow Cab, paid for by Save Your Victim. If we can prevent one person from driving drunk – which we have! – it is all worth it.
“To date, we have given out over 500 rides. It also helps bring awareness, as the local and national news have covered the events. I have also had the opportunity to speak at local schools, to prison groups, DUI offender groups, and to collaborate with other nonprofits around the U.S. I was asked to speak at an event that was held at Ohio University, as part of Prom Promise, to over 600 high school students. It was surreal being back at my alma mater, but if you are willing to share your story, there are people willing to listen …. and hopefully learn.”
Life-changing
This experience changed Alasya’s life. “My husband always says that after the crash, I became someone different, that I see the world with new eyes,” she says. “I never ever could have guessed my brother – or anyone I know, for that matter – would have caused something like this, and I would be visiting them in prison, let alone that my family would be sharing that story with the world.”
But there has been growth.
“At first, it was scary, because we were facing such a huge unknown. We all experienced a lot of questions and worrying about how Matthew would adjust and, really, survive. He was going through a lot and I visited him – and still do – almost every Sunday. I always left in tears.
“It was emotional for about the first year as he figured it out, but fortunately, he did. Now I look forward to seeing him, because he has grown up so much and appreciates things in a much different way. I don’t worry now about him being in prison – although my parents still do! He has missed a lot, though, in this time, the hardest being the passing of both of our grandparents, whom he was extremely close with. My sister got married in 2016, and of course he wasn’t there. But he will get to come home and for that I am grateful.
“We are lucky. He is a completely different person. He is emotionally stable, mature and healthy. It’s funny – now HE gives ME advice, and sometimes even worries about me. I do feel he deserves to be there, and I am relieved he has used the experience to better himself and even graduate from Ohio University. It is hard to describe, but also painful, because we are missing out on that person.
“I am unbelievably proud of the person he has become. He is truly living for two people now.”
Editor’s note: View Matthew Cordle’s video, “I Killed a Man,” at https://becauseisaidiwould.com/drunkdriverconfession/. In addition, Sarah Alasya encourages readers to visit SaveYourVictim.com or find them on Facebook, and share how drinking and driving has affected their lives. “We’re always looking for new stories and voices to help expand the conversation,” she says.